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Raggles's picture

Submitted by Raggles on Sat, 08/01/2015 - 4:59pm

SO and I are done.
I love him dearly but clearly he doesnt feel the same way.
After a light hearted conversation about marriage that turned into a declaration of what he dislikes about me i can see no future with him anymore.
I was so hurt by his comments that he thinks I will stop him from seeing his family there is no way i can be with a man that thinks that of me.
I moved out of the home back in Feb as there was friction between his kids and I and I wanted to save our relationship. Wish i hadnt bothered staying with him now. Months of heart ache and effort for nothing.
Surely if i wasnt going to allow him to see his kids (not sure how i would even begin to do that) i would have remained in the house and made them move out.

so STalkers this lass is back on the market for a kid free man!!!
Chances of finding one??? Zero!!
Oh well....

Comments

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Sun, 08/02/2015 - 3:27pm

Wow, Raggles. I couldn't stay with someone who thought that of me, either. I think it's the proper stance to take, too often bypassed by many sms, to have expectations for what the partner thinks of you. A lot of the sms here post how they are loaded down with dh's accusations. That's not your burden! Reject it! And so you have done. That is really great.

Sorry it came to this but good thing you finally found out. Sorry for the wasted time, too. Too bad life doesn't offer do-overs. I would like some myself. But that stupid Time thing does seem determined to march in one direction. Physicists, get busy!

What a rash of breakups here lately.

notasm3's picture

Submitted by notasm3 on Sat, 08/01/2015 - 5:14pm

You do not have to find a kid free man. You just need to find a man who is not ball free.

Not all men with kids are assholes. It's not the skids it's the man.

twopines's picture

Submitted by twopines on Sat, 08/01/2015 - 5:16pm

THIS!

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Sat, 08/01/2015 - 5:20pm

I really want to plaster my room with posters displaying some of your pithy gems, notasm. Seriously. This one is awesome.

Last In Line's picture

Submitted by Last In Line on Sat, 08/01/2015 - 9:13pm

Count it as a learning experience and move on to better things!
Good job taking care of you. Dirol

thisisnotmocking's picture

Submitted by thisisnotmocking on Sun, 08/02/2015 - 6:16am

Don't say your chances are zero!! I'm in my 40's and just met someone that doesn't have kids and doesn't want any Biggrin it's possible!

Indigo's picture

Submitted by Indigo on Mon, 08/03/2015 - 2:27am

Raggles, I'm sorry to hear ... {Hugs}

For a few, moving out helps. For many of us, moving out signals the end. Either you or DH was okay for letting the marriage go, it sounds.

You've moved. Stuff is separated. Maybe some $$ still needs to be settled. Otherwise, you were constructively divorced a bit ago.

Disagree w/tommmar ... it's not choosing an unmarried male w/o children; it's choosing a man with depth, experience and an understanding of his role as parent.

Sweet T's picture

Submitted by Sweet T on Mon, 08/03/2015 - 8:16am

I am going to be 47 this month and my 46 year old BF has never been married ( lived with someone for 19 years who cheated on him) has no kids, doesn't want to get married or have kids and is very good with my 8 year old son. It is possible!