Boyfriend and I are both divorced. He has 3 kids from his previous marriage 8-13y/o and I have 2 ages 5 and 8 from mine both of us with 50/50 custody of them. The younger 4 are all boys and tend to hang together. In anticipation of cohabitation and subsequently marriage, we're trying to figure out to blend these families the "right" way or at least minimize the impact on everyone. We started by taking the kids to do things together in neutral places to get used to each other and at this point we've split time between both houses. I would be the one moving so we've also done a couple of sleepovers with them all at boyfriend's house. It works out that we will have them all together 1 day a week and ever other weekend. This is still going to be a disruption to their schedule on those days as well as figuring out sleeping arrangements for all of the boys. All the boys currently have their own rooms at our respective homes, but they tend to sleep with their brothers. We don't know how willing boyfriend's boys will be to officially bunk up together. Is this asking too much?...do we put both of my boys together in another room entirely for a while until a dynamic changes naturally on its own? On top of this my oldest is reluctant to move, I think he will be fine once it happens, but I want him to know its coming and learn to adjust to that idea beforehand.

Basically, any advice on how to do this with 5 kids when you don't know what you're getting into , but know where things are headed, is appreciated. We both feel like there have got to be people out there that have done this and can provide some guidance. We've been pretty thoughtful so far when it comes to the kids, but the real test is how to get this all under one roof(which actually may be more important than getting married) at some point. TIA.