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Yup.. me again! Trying to prepare mentally

feduplilme2015's picture

Tomorrow is one of the days my DH's kids come to my house...therefore after a wonderful weekend together (first time in a long time w/o any issues bc of his kids) they will be there. I usually see a little bit of them but they thank GOD leave on Wednesday a.m. early enough that I don't see their freaking faces). And to top it off this weekend is a kids weekend, so that means Friday p.m. to Monday a.m. there with us.

Please help me with some advice as to how to act... bc I just know me AND my face, I can't hide anything that bothers me, so I know it is bound to happen where they will be doing the stupid s*** they do every freaking weekend while they are with us.

Ohhh, and we are "moving" (let's see how much gets done for us to actually move in to the new house) too, with Volleyball tournaments (Saturday for SD13, dad got her involved in the sport after MY daughter has been involved for the past 10 yrs, so now she is but she is HORRIBLE at it,lol) and Sunday my BD15 will have her tournament. So yes, a packed weekend....

Help!!! :jawdrop:

feduplilme2015's picture

Thanks for the advice.... they are good ideas. As for the Volleyball info, my mentioning it is because his daughter was enrolled to do this (we paid a lot of money) and now that she is involved our money is wasted bc the times she is with her mother (practices...tournaments) she is not there, so yes... I am upset about that. I made sure to talk to my DH about the fact that I knew with every FIBER in me that we would be wasting money with getting her involved bc the BioM mom is not going to prob take her, so where is our money going?

The SD13 has been involved in EVERYTHING dance and we have had to pay and done the driving even though it was not our deal at all but that is not reciprocated of course. So yes, yup I am not happy about that. Only reason she wanted to join was bc of my daughter (which has been disciplined with it for 10 yrs, thanks to me) my DH , his Bio kids and their Bio mom are NOT disciplined at anything....

LOL... and yes, thanks for seeing me over-thinking all of this. Is very true... I just like to prepare myself mentally bc I know what is coming once they are there.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Agree...find something to do tomorrow evening on your own. Tell DH you just need some you time, and he can spend time with the kiddos. Get a mani/pedi, meet some girlfriends at the coffee shop, etc

As for the weekend, I would just submerge myself into the moving activities on Saturday. When it is time to go to your bio's tournament, go and focus on her and only her. After a while, you will become a master at ignoring the skids. Yes, they may do things to bug you, but when HHB was here, I would just talk around her as if she weren't even in the room, and that seemed to annoy the crap out of her..."DH, you need to tell HHB to clean up her mess that she left in the TV room. I'm not her maid!" He would often say, "Why can't you tell her?" and I would respond every time with, "She doesn't respect me...so this is now your problem!" It got to the point DH would just walk behind her picking up her messes for her to keep me from saying anything. Annoyed me, because it still wasn't teaching her to respect my home, but at least her crap wasn't laying around!

feduplilme2015's picture

LOL.... loved your idea, pretty funny! I think tomorrow afternoon, I will register to take my first Yoga class, maybe this will "change my life" (lol) for the better. And about ignoring them, I am great at it, but still have a hard time at times.

Glad you found a way to deal with these issues... I am 5 yrs in and still making myself sick over all of this.

Baby steps, I guess!

Thanks again.... Smile