HELP PLEASE
I need help and advice.
I am engaged to wonderful woman, we have been together for about 8 years now. When we got together she was two months pregnant by her husband that she had recently left and her mother had custody of her two boys due to somethings that she had done years prior to us meeting and her and her husband not being able to get things straightened back out. Which along with being abusive is why she left him. She had finally had enough. Two years ago we won custody of the boys back from her mom and step dad. Since then the oldest has decided that he is not going to go to school, refuses to be a part of the family, treats everyone like crap, and only wants to back the other, bad, side of town and smoke pot, which he is not shy about at all. He hates my guts because I yell at him because he refuses to do anything productive and I just want him to apply himself, respect his family, try at anything besides being a punk. He is following in his fathers footsteps of being in and out of jail and on who knows what drugs. How in the world do I, we, get him redirected????
Only thing that comes to my
Only thing that comes to my mind is military school! Seriously, the boy is not going to respect you or your wife. His father has showed him he doesn't have to! Nothing you say he will take to heart.
I looked into military
I looked into military school, its expensive. And I dont think she would send him anyway.
Try one of
Try one of these.
www.nmmi.edu/
carsonlong.org
They are the two most affordable military boarding school options we found for my SS. We would have put him in my Military School but sadly it closed in 2002. My dad and I and my younger brother all attended.
Military school did wonders for my Skid just like it did for my dad, my brother, and me.
Good luck.
What does the mother do when
What does the mother do when he is acting out?
She complains about his
She complains about his behavior to me then gives in to him about anything and everything. He played the "You owe me" card and guilt trips her at every turn. Then she jumps down my throat whenever I get on him about anything, even if i dont say anything to him but just to her....
Sounds like my DH! Luckily, I
Sounds like my DH! Luckily, I didn't have to be concerned about violence of any kind like I'm sure you do (being a guy and all, and yeah, my SD will scream at you but isn't brave enough to take a swing...biggest worry is her lying that you took a swing at her). Wasn't much I could do when HHB (my nickname for her...Her High B***hness) lived here, and was so thankful when she ran off to live with mom! DH FINALLY put his foot down, and she ran off and told all kinds of lies to BM to make her feel sorry for her and let her move back, and immediately got into more trouble.
I understand your helplessness. I was seriously considering getting out of the marriage before HHB left, because it was looking to me like the only alternative. My husband wasn't ever going to stand up to her. Was actually shocked when he did, and the result was a blessing!
Right now I have what he has
Right now I have what he has left here packed up for him to take back with him the next time he decides to come visit. She blew up on me saying that I am not kicking her 15yr old son out. My reply was that he doesn't live here anyway. I'm tired of him ruling this house and I can't even say anything.
That is my plan if he gets
That is my plan if he gets caught. I'm not going to bail him out. And I do worry about legal consequences but she wont stop. Its like she just can't help it.
Ive read this post
Ive read this post before...about 6 months before??
Have you posted before?
Nope. Just found this site.
Nope. Just found this site. I did post on Facebook the other day but I noticed it showed up on my wall so I deleted them.
I found this site and thought
I found this site and thought that I had found a place with people that would be able to provide some advice with this situation but what I have seen from reading others posts and the comments there and here is that most of you are simply heartless and rude. I have my beliefs and she has hers and we have been looking for solutions and way to get control, a meeting in the middle. Something. So, I thank the few of you that actually posted something helpful and I say goodbye.