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I told him this would happen.

Evil stepmonster's picture

DH usually gets Redface Magee for a few hours every Saturday because he only spends the entire weekend with us once a month. This Saturday started off well. I went to BS9 soccer game, he went to see Redface. I was enjoying the game, it was a good one, when hands go over my face and I hear surprise.
Surprised I was, infact I couldn't have been more surprised even if my unicor shit m$m's instead of skittles.
Me- What are you doing here?
DH- I wanted to see the boy play.
Me- You brought Redface?
DH- Yeah, he wanted to see BS9 play too.
Oh joy. All I wanted to do was sit and watch and cheer my little man on. Now I've got a skid, a crazy one here who won't shut up about how he got in a fight on the school bus because the kid sitting next to him was.....sitting next to him. Obviously this kid didn't realize that that was Redfaces bus and he calls the shots. *eye roll* sigh.
Two older kids were there, during half time they were playing on the field, that's pretty normal at soccer games.
RFM wanted to play goalie. And there lights the fuse.
Me- I don't think that's a very good idea DH, these kids, they don't care if Redface is your "special little baby" he gives them shit, they'll give it right back.
DH- It's fine, he's not going to start anything.
Me- *the look I give when I hear something so freekin stupid* Yeah, ok.
Hey, it lasted 5 minutes, longer than I thought. The other two kids got goals. Several infact which pissed Redface off. Now, the two older boys were speaking spanish and laughing. Were they saying anything about Redface or making fun of him, I have no clue, but he sure thought they were.
Game started, and here is Redface, breathing hard and have already yelled at the two to shut the fuck up. Now...the quickest way to find out if a person; who hasn't said a word of english, understands or speaks engilsh is to start cussing at them and insulting them. I told DH that those kids do infact go to school here, they understand him, and they don't give a shit if he has "anger issues" (yes, I did the quotation marks with my fingers)
I was right, they understood him. They also thought it was quite humerous that he was just sitting there, breathing hard like he'd just run a marathon, tears in his eyes, looking pissed and focusing entirely on them.
Me- DH, maybe it's a good idea to take Redface somewhere else now.
DH- Why, *looks at Redface* boy calm down, it's not a big deal.
RFM- Yes it is, they are making fun of me because I couldn't stop the ball. They can't make fun of me for that.
Me- Redface, it's a free country, they can make fun of anyone for anything they want. That doesn't mean you have to let it ruin your day.
RFM- No, they can't. They're stupid assholes who pissed me off, no one is allowed to piss me off.
DH- Boy, you better watch your mouth.
Me- You don't make rules for everyone else. Neither does your mother. They can do what ever they want, so ignore them and they'll stop. Hell, we don't even know if they were making fun of you. Do you know spanish?
RFM- No, but I know they're dirty mexican assholes who need to go home.
*screeching brake sound*
Now at this point, he was yelling. Everyone...everyone heard him yell that including the ref who was himself mexican. Including BS9 who is infact, half mexican. All eyes were on us now and I was so mortified that this little asshole did this. I was pissed at BM1 for teaching him that society was not allowed to be against him in any way ever, and I was pissed at DH for allowing his son to believe that stuff.
Me- You better get him out of here now.
It was two late. The two boys were walking over towards him now.
They didn't do anything, they just stood there, looking at Redface. They didn't say anything. DH told Redface to get his stuff and that he was going to take him back home now. That got him ever more red faced and he clinched his teeth and was breathing harder. The two boys stood their and laughed at him. He then took is soda, shook it, and sprayed the two boys down with sprite, in 50 degree weather. Yelling at them that it was all their faults that he had to go back home now. He wasn't ready to go back home.
Not sure if DH would have spanked him for that or not but he didn't even have the chance to figure it out. One boy slide tackled Redface who fell backwords, the other kicked the soccer ball right into Redfaces face which bent his glasses. The ref stopped the game, came over to us, kicked the two boys, and Redface off the field.
Me- I told you not to let him try and play soccer with those two. I told you it wouldn't be fine. I told you he was going to be out of control one day and piss someone off. I told you...just get him out of here please.
I apologized to all of the parents for his racist remarks. The two boys parents apologized for them being rude to Redface but said before they really weren't talking about him, they were talking to smack to each other.
She could be lying herself, I don't know. The coach came up to me after the game, he himself is mexican, he told me that he really doesn't think it would be a good idea to bring Redface back to watch one of BS9's games...ever.
I can't say I disagree with him. I asked DH if that taught him anything. He wouldn't talk about it. He did apologize to BS9 for Redfaces dirty mexican remark. On the way home BS9 told me that from now on, when Redface is coming over to our house for the day he would rather just go to his dads house and come back when he leaves. I can't say I blame him. I don't know what reaction I'll get from the other two when they find out about the racist remark. All three bios take pride in both my family background and their fathers background.
I took a long hot bath Saturday night and thought to myself...that one sentence said in anger by an unruly brat has now widened the wedge in our blended family. I don't know if this gap and be bridged. I know I lost a lot of respect of DH that day. I still don't know if he said anything to Redface, if he spanked him, yelled at him, punished him. Even if he did, what good would it do. He took him back to BM1, and anytime Redface gets in trouble and is upset she just hugs him tight, tells him how he's just misunderstood, a good boy, a special baby, and then takes him to get a new video game. I'm sure this is not the last I will hear of this.

Comments

tryingmom's picture

Sad I have no words. RFM pissed me off and I wasn't there.

I'd tell RFM that being a racist and an asshole was not tolerated in your home and that he'd better check himself before he EVER uttered anything racist again.

FFS....parents?

Evil stepmonster's picture

Oh, he was mortified, and probably scared. There is only one other halfy on the team and the rest are mexican.

just.his.wife's picture

The skid is lucky he isnt MY skid. Because the words would have come out of his mouth and my auto insticts would have kicked in and I would have slapped the little effer out of the stands.

No thought, simple reaction.

And I am willing to bet every parent and coach around would have sworn on a stack of bibles, that the resulting injuries happened when the kid was "not listening" and "screwing around" and fell off the bleachers due to being a jerk and not listening to his parents.

momagainfor4's picture

I don't really condone spanking. I spanked my kids.. well, no just my son really. Some kids just need a good swat from time to time to make the message a bit clearer. That's just the way it is.

Sounds like redface brat needs a asskicking. Either way, he'll get it one way or another if he keeps up that sort of talk. I'm especially upset that he chose to use those words about the race knowing that your son was there and that he's hispanic? I think that is what you were saying.

It makes me wonder what he really thinks of everyone?? I wouldn't want to be around him either to be honest.

Evil stepmonster's picture

I have wondered now. I don't know if his BM or stepdad is racist, but I'm waiting for the fall out from my 3. It's coming. They all see their dad tonight and viva la mexico will be present when they get home. I already told DH he's just gonna have to suck it up and put up with them leaning towards the mexican side for a while.

Willow2010's picture

This kid is screwed up. But he is getting bad parenting from all around. DH should have never let him play. then he should have gotten him out of there as soon as it started to go bad.
I do have a question though...why did you bring up his mother in the middle of all of this? Surely you did not think downgrading his mother for no reason, would make this situation any better. In fact it sounds like that is when he really went off his rocker.

Evil stepmonster's picture

If you try to talk to him about anything he's doing wrong he will flat out tell you, my mommy says it's never my fault, I'm special and everyone needs to treat me that way. Sadly, she does tell him that, she's even snapped at his teacher when she suspended him from recess for a week. DH and I have had to tell him that, well your mommy isn't here and I say you are acting wrong and you will not get away with it.

furkidsforme's picture

Holy crap, who lets a kid use such language and be so racist without smacking their lips right off their face???

No wonder he's a little shit. It must have taken years of lax parenting to leave him feeling so free in his speech.

Evil stepmonster's picture

I'm sure his mom will come up with something to explain it away that is has nothing to do with Redface himself but probably those two bullies and aspergers. Again, I don't think you can blame racism on aspergers, I also don't think he simply has aspergers. The saddest part of all of this is DH himself is a halfy. He doesn't look it, neither do his kids, but you go to his mothers side of the family and you will see a sweet old lady from Mexico City making tamales for all the grandkids. (not MIL, she is not sweet and does not cook)

Delilah's picture

I have a suggestion for your dh, which would likely cure ss of his sheer arseholery but at the least would dissuade him from repeating the same mistake again, and that would be instead of hustling him out of there in embarassment, he should have turned him over his knee and smacked his arse for all to see. Humilitate the little shit in public, as really your dh poor attempts at disciplining ss and discouraging all the namby pamby parenting by bm is FAILING! Doesnt dh want ss to be happy and productive? He sounds incredibly unhappy, confused, stupid, immature, ignorant and an absolute entitled brat. No kids will friend a child like that and it will make him all the more angry, pious and cruel. Do the child a favour and his dad should come down on him like a ton of bricks.

P.s your dh apologise to bs9? Why the fuck didnt dh drag ss to apologise to bs in person? THATS what he should be insisting on ffs! He failing him spectacularly, and usually its due to their own selfishness -fear of losing him, laziness, ego. Trouble is, he already losing him...

Evil stepmonster's picture

I think you're right, I would say send him to stay with his ggm for a weekend, but I'd be scared for her. She don't play and always has a chonkla ready. lol