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Interesting conversation

Evil stepmonster's picture

As time comes closer to OBS graduating I've noticed he isn't speaking with many people any more. The friends he's had since 7th 8th grade. I was curious and asked last night.
Me- So what's up with you? You've become so antisocial lately.
OBS- Not really, I just don't care for certain people any more.
Me- These same people that you didn't want to move away from because you wanted to graduate with all your homies?
OBS- Some yeah.
Me- Wish we would have moved away now?
OBS- No, I mean I still talk to them at school, I'm looking forward to graduating with them I just don't really want to talk or hang out with them out side of school. I don't hate them, just not as good of friends now as I thought we were back then.
Me- Why is that?
OBS - Honestly mom, after what happen last year I don't want to deal with all the damn drama they keep around them. It's always he said she said crap and I don't want to be put in the middle or asked to choose sides because come on, it's high school. Our real lives start next year, I'm supposed to be having fun and being stupid, I can't ever have fun or be stupid because all these dumb asses are taking every single little thing that happens like it's a matter of life or death and I'm to old for all that crap.
Me- Ahh, well I can see how that would be annoying your senior year. You know though, there's always going to be some type of drama. You'll never be completely drama free even when you're an adult.
OBS- I know, but I damn sure won't have as much crap to deal with as you.
Me- Oh really, why is that?
OBS- I'm never going to date, live with, or marry any one that already has kids!!
Me- Good talk son. Good plan too.

ItHasGottenBetter's picture

Sounds like your son is ready to jump into his future. Good Job Momma!

On a side note: I remember 1 thing the principle said at my DDs graduation. He said the staff usually sees kids ready to jump into adulthood about Feb or March of their Senior year. This group here was ready to fly after their first day bc they were mature and ready to make their marks on the world.

Evil stepmonster's picture

I warned him that the pond he'll be fishing in won't be all that big but I do hope he keeps that plan going.

Jsmom's picture

Pretty common. BS19 seemed to do the same thing with his friends. No use for anyone unless they were on the same path as him. At college he has a core 5 or 6 friends and has no use for anymore. SS16 has always been this way. No use for anyone that is immature. He will only talk to two girls that he is good friends, says the rest have too much drama.

Can't get either boy to date at all. Both say the girls are too immature. For BS19, there are so few girls in the engineering school that he is at and then he is too selective. I am starting to think I am not having grandchildren.

Rags's picture

I met my bride while I was at engineering school. The pickings in my engineering class were pretty thin and She was in the accounting program. I was extremely picky much like your BS19. Though I was 10 years older than he is. I met my amazing bride during the final semester of my 11yr undergrad career and her first semester out of HS. The first time I set eyes on my bride was at the beginning of my last semester. She walked into the student center and all conversation stopped. I told the table of friends I was with that there was my next wife. I was years post divorce from my adulterous whore of an XW. Fortunately we had no spawn and I had no baggage from that hell time of my life.

Though I did not know it when I first saw her and first asked her out my DW did have some baggage. A 15mo old toddler who would be a huge part of the rest of my life (as it is unfolding). Baggage is not necessarily a deal breaker if the partner with the baggage has learned something from their experiences and can keep from carrying any toxic bullshit forward in their lives.

At your son's age there is no need for dating to be a commitment. My own experiences of dating and unfortunately a failed marriage are part of what made me the man that my bride tolerates. Wink

Rags's picture

OBS is one intelligent young man and mature beyond his years. Good job raising that one mom.

Society should appreciate your effective parenting. There is no entitlement in that young man.