Emergency Appointment with Therapist Today
My blood pressure shot up to 200/90 last night.
I called my therapist and she got me in later this afternoon.
Something has to give with SS15.
I wrote a post yesterday about what's been going on, and I found one response especially helpful (thanks, Ditzy!). She said that if DH continues to ignore SS15 like he's ignoring me, things will get worse. I thought about this, and I'm seeing that it's true. I brought it to DH's attention. Since DH hasn't been up his ass, SS has been getting his way with everything. He doesn't have to interact with us. Since he isn't eating meals with us, he isn't part of the dinner chore rotation. Him eating PB&J every night is a win for him, since he'd rather eat that than a real meal anyway. Since wetting his bed the other night, he's been sleeping on a bare, plastic-covered mattress. He doesn't have to make his bed or hand wash the sheets if he pisses the bed again-win!
DH said if it doesn't affect us directly, we shouldn't worry about it. Let him sleep on a bare mattress. Let him eat sandwiches for dinner. But this means he's getting exactly what he wants! DH is seeing it now, and we both see that we've been completely manipulated by this asshole. He knows exactly what he's doing, and he's reveling in it.
He'll be knocked off his high horse tonight.
DH also is pissed because he looked online ad found that SS has been charging hot lunches and snacks at school, which he has been banned (by DH) from doing as he was caught stealing food from the lunch line. DH is PISSED.
I'll keep everyone posted. I have a feeling the top about to blow off of this powder keg. At least I hope it is. Things can't remain status quo much longer.
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Comments
I know, I'm so lost. I'm a
I know, I'm so lost. I'm a licensed social worker. I help people fix their problems for a living, but I'll be damned if I can navigate through this mess!
The boys don't have TV in
The boys don't have TV in their bedrooms. SS15 has lost all access to video games and the computer because of poor grades and attitude. (He suddenly thinks he's all that he miraculously has all As and Bs on his mid-quarter report. Sorry, SS. All that proves is that you CAN pull your head out of your ass.) Since he's decided to not be part of our family, there have been no extras. No dinners out, no trips to get ice cream, none of that.
Dammit, now I'm hungry!!
That sounds fantastic!
I'd love that! I should send
I'd love that! I should send away for some brochures and just leave them casually lying around the house....
He seems to be okay- he's
He seems to be okay- he's taking 18 credits in college, working 20 hours a week, and teaching taekwondo, so he's busy and out of the house a lot. BS gets the issues with SS and the PAS. He understands the dynamics of what's going on. He's really close with both DH and I and asks questions, but doesn't seem to be affected by the crap much. SS15 actually interacts with BS too; it's just me he pretends doesn't exist.
(((hugs))) sounds like he's a
(((hugs)))
sounds like he's a lost cause... my brother was already dead set in his ways at that age. ended up getting kicked out (twice!) to go live with mom.
no advice really. i've also got the step-induced bp thing too, so u're not alone.
again, (((hugs)))
Thanks! I honestly think he's
Thanks! I honestly think he's a lost cause too, and there are very few people I consider to be lost causes. But this kid wants nothing positive from any of us. He doesn't want to be part of our family. Our therapist already suggested we let him go, but DH doesn't want to do that at this point. That will be giving him all the power, giving him exactly what he wants. And honestly, I'd rather deal with his shit for 2 1/1 more years than pay a dime of my household money to that troll who spawned him from her nether quarters. Not a penny of it would go to SS's care, unless it's to buy him yet another video game system to feed his addiction. No thanks.