See something bad Need advice! Please Help!!!
First off I'm new here I've read some posts on this site but after seeing what i saw I need advice! Last night I was staying the night at my girlfriends house when I saw something that left me in total shock! My girlfriend has a 3 children from a different man an 8 year old son, a 4 year old daughter, and a 1 year old daughter! Well last night while laying on my girlfriends bed I happen to look down on the floor and I see her 8 year old son poking his 4 year old sisters private area on the outside of her shorts! It was like he knew what he was doing he had her holding her legs back like he knew what he was doing! I immediately told him to stop and got up to tell my girlfriend who was cleaning her kitchen! For some reason he's always gave me a weird vibe because he seems like he loves his mom and sisters more than he should if you know what I mean! I told my girlfriend she needs to talk to her daughter and find out if this has happened before, because I don't think he would admit to it if he has done it before! I have a feeling like last night wasn't the first time he's tried something like that! My girlfriend whooped him and gave him a talking to after I told her but I don't think that's enough! I feel like she should have her daughter checked at the hospital to see if her son has tried anything worse to her daughter in the past I think if he was that comfortable to try what he did with me in the room and think he was gonna get away with it what else might he have tried already! Another thing that scares me is I also have a 4 year old daughter and now I'm kinda in fear of bringing her around my girlfriends house because of this situation! What should I do I wanna tell her she needs to get her daughter checked but I don't know how to tell her because she's so devastated by what happened! I'm so shocked right now and don't know what to do, I really appreciate some advice!
Gobsmacked. I can't figure
Gobsmacked. I can't figure this out.
If a child is threatened, or whooped-up on or felt up on ... just "drop a dime." If you report anonymously then no-one knows, but the children will be protected. I am not certain that you're in a position to help without child-welfare specialists.
Let's not even speak about the 3 baby-daddy issues. Sorry, this entire post reads more like Jerry Springer than real life. Report. Don't know how ? Ask us.
That's what I thought it said
That's what I thought it said at first, too, but then re-read. He actually said "from a different man" not MEN. She has 3 children by another man. At least I hope that wasn't a typo...
The kids are from the same
The kids are from the same man! I had a talk with my father about it and my father told me I should of beat the tar out of him myself when I seen that! I wanna tell her she needs to have her daughter checked at the hospital because I feel like this has happen more than once!, and she needs to know if it has or if he's tried something worse before! I really just don't know how to tell her because of how devastated she is but I know I need to tell her! I feel like a whoopin and a talkin to isn't enough I feel like that's like putting a pedophile in prison for 2 years and letting him out so he can do it again! In my opinion if it's found out he's been doing this regularly I think he should be sent to a juvenile hall!
I am in no way defending what
I am in no way defending what this boy did. it is absolutely wrong. but can we all just take a minute to wonder why he did this?! Is there a possibility he himself is being or has been sexually abused?! I'm a foster parent and most often the children that abuse other children are the ones that have been abused. Its important not to beat him into not doing it but teach him that it is wrong and why it is wrong. If he has been sexually abused he would not understand that it is wrong to sexually abuse others
Too late, he got the taste
Too late, he got the taste for it.
You could retrain him, basically instill self-restraint, but he will always get that high from perpetrating, I heard a study on NPR about this, power becomes like a drug to them.
I feel like the boy needs his
I feel like the boy needs his face beat in and locked up in a juvenile corrections facility! I'm just gonna flat out tell my girl friend she needs to have her daughter checked plain and simple, because I know if something isn't done now, he'll do it again!
I've been wondering that
I've been wondering that today too! The kids sometimes get to go stay with they're grandparents who are the fathers parents! They have a 17 year old uncle the fathers brother who I hear the boy is always hanging around during their visits so who knows what this boy is being exposed to or what might be being done to him on these visits! I think these visits to the grandparents should stop until my girlfriend gets to the bottom of all this!
Oh no, you cannot allow this
Oh no, you cannot allow this creeper around your kid. Date this girl, wear protection, but no way you are moving in. Trust me. My GF was in a similar situation and she finally had enough, moved out, it was a mess. You can wait until they are older and your girl can defend herself and/or he grows out of it.
He got the taste for sex and power and he has become a perpetrator. Poor kid, yes, but kids are not always innocent.
My older SD takes showers with my youngest SD and once in a while I hear her accuse YSD of "being gay". Not sure what is going on, but it is creepy. My boys cover their package when they happen to change in the same room, they have modesty, these skids are so gross.
Keep your kid away from young
Keep your kid away from young Mr. Molester and call an anonymous hotline to report the 8yo. Time to protect the 4yo.
IMHO of course.
I am not sure an 8yo with a
I am not sure an 8yo with a sexual interest has been molested. I was rubbing butts with my girl friends when we were 5ish. Playing kissing games at 6-7. And I'll show you mine if you show me yours with the girls when we were 8-9. Never did we go the extreme that your Skid did with his 4yo sister and never with a younger child.
This kid needs a major intervention and to have CPS scare the shit out of him.
IMHO of course.
Thanks for the advice
Thanks for the advice everyone! Were taking the girls to go get checked and were looking into some help for the boy! He's always gave me a strange vibe and I never really thought on it until I seen what I saw! This boy needs serious help tho! He is ver definite and disrespectful to people espeically to his mother, and despite getting a whooping for what he's done he really has no fear of getting in trouble! After we have these girls checked out I think that if there is any signs of abuse the law needs to be involved! I really don't think the other night was the first time this has happened, and I could be wrong but I think getting the law involved would be a good way to put a stop to this, but I don't know because I've never been in a situation like this before!
Thanks for the advice
Thanks for the advice everyone! Were taking the girls to go get checked and were looking into some help for the boy! He's always gave me a strange vibe and I never really thought on it until I seen what I saw! This boy needs serious help tho! He is ver definite and disrespectful to people espeically to his mother, and despite getting a whooping for what he's done he really has no fear of getting in trouble! After we have these girls checked out I think that if there is any signs of abuse the law needs to be involved! I really don't think the other night was the first time this has happened, and I could be wrong but I think getting the law involved would be a good way to put a stop to this, but I don't know because I've never been in a situation like this before!
Well, my first thought would
Well, my first thought would be "where has this 8 year old boy gotten the idea that this is acceptable behavior"? He learned that from somewhere. Don't be too hard on him; he is just a child himself. Ask him some questions. Get to the root of this problem....that little boy is NOT the root, I can assure you.