No good deed goes unpunished
So DH has SD and SGB staying with us for several weeks until SSIL completes 4 year military term, home at start of September. They have both seriously mismanaged the finances, have student loan and medical debt up the wazoo but were still able to afford a collectors car (which had to be sold at a big loss), tattoos, etc. leaving them with one leased car between the two of them and no jobs lined up for the big exit and...DH has borrowed our best vehicle to "help out"....long story...
Anyway, DH and I were going on a vacation and I normally board two dogs with Camp Bow Wow and take the good traveler with. Since huskies love to run, I worry they would get loose on a house sitter, or something might happen. I love Camp Bow Wow even though they are spendy. I have let my high school dog walker that comes in once a day when I am at work, house sit for me and it did work out good soooo...against my better judgement, I asked SD24 if she would like to earn the $ vs. pay CBW. Deal was $70 x 5 days = $350 cash. Since the are low on cash I thought it would help, easy money for stay at home mom and a win for me because a professional is more expensive. She was thrilled and agreed.
So here I am in vacation and her Facebook posting starts with "sick baby, can't get fever down...going to doctor." SD is on high maintenance, coddled by both parents list so drama runs high.
Later post was something about caring for sick baby, dog comes in living room and poops on carpet (part of flooring I paid $8000 for)!! This means dog 1 is either not getting let out as per schedule, or is having separation anxiety (he is senior so schedule I non-negotiable. Then she finishes post with "enjoying beer and a movie"
Many postings followed on the level of sympathy that this was all happening to her!! I was slightly upset and posted "Oh no...please, please keep dog in mud room." Mud room has no carpeting and dog bed. Someone then posts after mine, "oh you poor thing, feel bad this is happening to you." Like she is being forced to watch my dogs. I am paying her $350 for five days and she seemed thrilled! I told her that if this was too much, with baby, I would be happy to send them to Bow Wow. She had every out and was not forced. Now my carpet has been pooped on, dog is stressed, carpet is probably not cleaned properly, and the whole world feels sorry for her, and....DH is totally backing her up as he sees me finding this to be disturbing. Lesson, always have dogs boarded and don't try to help SKIDS because no good deed goes unpunished!!
Thanks for lthe listen.
You are all correct about the
You are all correct about the poor dogs and disengage. Lesson learned. Never again!! Fur babies did nothing to deserve this. I usually disengage but I had a week moment. Working on being strong is a day by day process.
I go home tomorrow and they
I go home tomorrow and they WILL be spoiled!
I am sure the carpeting will need a cleaning. Pretty sure that in her mind, correct carpet cleaning was not part of the deal. It will never occure to her that this was completely "operator error" and NOT the dog's fault.
It's amazing how grown
It's amazing how grown stepkids can be so irresponsible. Hell I wouldn't let my youngest SD babysit a goldfish for a few hours she is so lazy. 24 years old and too lazy to put on a new roll of toilet paper when it runs out.
Like everybody else, I only feel sorry for your dogs.
Mine is same age and forgets
Mine is same age and forgets to flush!
SD offered to babysit my
SD offered to babysit my chickens for me one time while we went out of town.
LOLOLOL! Like I would EVER trust her to do ANYTHING for any of my animals.
My answer was the same as usual: Oh Hell No.
I have no family in the area
I have no family in the area but will be home tomorrow. Never again!
The couple...yes, very unprepared for life. I think they will have to file ch. 13 for a fresh start because it looks beyond hopeless. I don't agree with this but they have a huge mess and don't even see it!
I think I should take dogs and run away!
Awww... Bless you!
Awww... Bless you!
You know, I have kinda
You know, I have kinda learned the same lesson. EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. I do anything nice for SDstb13, I totally regret it.
I would definitely cut her
I would definitely cut her pay.
^^^^^^This makes me love you,
^^^^^^This makes me love you, notasm. I love a happy, spoiled dog who is always looked after by responsible people!
Whenever I start getting puppy fever I eventually remember SD15. It would be irresponsible to have a dog in the house where she lives as she would inevitably be alone with it occasionally and that would be a nightmare.
Aw, poor puppy! Hopefully SD
Aw, poor puppy! Hopefully SD was only late walking him once and the rest of the time she did what she was supposed to. (And hopefully she cleaned the darn carpet!!)
As for the FB posts giving her sympathy though, let that one go. The person who posted after you probably never even read your comment, she was offering sympathy for a sick baby and having to clean up poop. (Which... yeah, I get. I've got 3 little ones, and feverish cranky babies are seriously no fun.) None of it was a jab at you - or the dogs - it was just a vent on her part that her day sucked. Sure, probably her fault, and not really that bad, and sure she's getting paid - but sometimes people vent about the sucky parts of life because sometimes you just need to. (That's why I'm here, after all!) Let that part go - be pissed if she mistreated your dogs, absofreakinglutely, but not because she complained about a crappy day.
Good point. It is what it is
Good point. It is what it is and DH did actually step up to the plate and talk to her about more efficient ways to take care of the situation. Dog is senior so needs extra TLC that he did not need when younger and it is hard to watch fur babies age. Lesson learned, next time I will let the professionals care for him if I am not able to take him.
In my experience your comment
In my experience your comment regarding helping people is exactly right.
When my SIL was allowed to graduate from HS a year early by my ILs (Sperm Land change the graduation requirements to save money by getting kids out of HS early) we offered to move her to TX to join our household. The deal was that if she watched the Skid after school until either his mom or I got home, watered, mowed, trimmed, and weeded the lawn and flower beds, and did a few hours of house cleaning each week (bath rooms, vacuuming, dusting, cleaning the kitchen, etc...) we would buy her a car, pay for her college tuition, and she would be be another member of our family. Vacations, going out to dinner, etc.... We were paying ~$400 in afterschool care for the Skid and ~$150/mo for lawn care at that time so even though having her with us, paying her tuition and getting her a car was more expensive than what we had been paying for kid and lawn care it was not prohibitively more and we figured it was a better use of our money.
Because my bride rode her ass like a cheap pony to get her to go to class, do her homework, etc.. her freshman year of college went fairly well and she had decent grades.
So, a year later she moved back home, got knocked up by her thug BF, eventually enrolled in the local university near my brides home town, and 10 years later is broke, eternally on the verge of bankruptcy, never graduated with a degree but has ~$80K in school loans, has spent thousands in tattoos though complains constantly about not being able to feed her kids and is always just a few weeks away from reposession of her and her now DH's cars, foreclosure on their home, etc.... Her life is spent eternally trolling for sympathy and drama.
We have also tried to help other members of my brides family only to not have them pay us back and using the money we "loaned" them on trivial crap rather than the critical thing they asked help with.
Never again, they starve, freeze, live under and over pass, lose their homes, cars, kids to the CPS, etc... on their own efforts and we will not step in to mitigate their idiot decisions ever again. It is liberating to not feel guilt over the stupid decisions of family. Sympathy and sorrow, sure. But not one sliver of guilt.
IMHO of course.