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Blog Hog---I think everyone is going to be *okay* for now

zerostepdrama's picture

Sorry to be such a blog hog lately. And thank you everyone for your support and advice and encouragement over the past few days. It has 100%+ helped me through this situation.

DH and I are *fine*. He came home after work. We talked a little. He says he understands why I wouldnt let her stay. He was mad at me about it but he understands. I am okay with that. I would be mad too if it was the other way around.

We will be going to counseling though to hash out the skid issues and talk about communication. Things are a little hectic around our house right now (see my BIOT comment) plus end of school year, BS8 in soccer. So hoping in a few weeks we can go when things settle down.

I dont think things are ever fully resolved with the skids, even if we do counseling. But that is okay. As long as we can communicate. We did counseling before and it helped A LOT so I am positive it will get us on the right track.

I am still upset about the whole blanket thing and "I am moving to PA" comment. I just feel like he added more drama to the situation then need be. I said if you keep making me look like the bad guy people are going to really think that. And your friends are going to feel uncomfortable around me and vice versa.

It will def. be brought up in counseling.

MSD has an apartment. Lease is signed.

The apartment is brand new- pool, tanning center, media room, game room. Better then any apartment I have ever lived in. Shoot better then my house! Its in her current city, so that is a plus.

It's one that DH works for so not sure if she is getting a discount? I think she probably could have found a cheaper one, but they obviously felt rushed for time to get her into a place and maybe DH feels like he can keep an eye on her?

It's $760 for a one bedroom!

DH said she is getting $700 a month in Social Security for GB because he was born 3 months premature.She will get that until he is 5. She is working 30-40 hours at $10 p/h. So she *should* be able to afford it. She is also taking BD for CS. He works for his father (owns construction company) so not sure how that will pan out. If he is paid under the table??? If father will alter his paystubs so he doesn't have to pay a lot in CS?

She has a car not sure if she is making payments or if its paid for.

Not sure if with her income and SS if she will qualify for food stamps or health insurance or childcare....

I asked DH what she was doing about furniture and stuff for the apartment and if she needed help. He said she was buying it all. Not sure if she has money saved up or what.

She has not read my FB message that I sent her yet. (which is fine) She doesn't really get on FB and I guess she currently does not have a phone. BF mom was paying for it (or something like that) and wouldnt let her take it with her when she kicked her out.

DH said that there was some grabbing and pushing back and forth between MSD and BF's mom. MSD got a scratch on her arm. Not sure how much of that I believe. Or who is to blame. I dont condone violence at all but MSD has a history of being violent with her parents and fighting at school so who knows who was really at fault.

Overall it sounds like MSD is in a decent place. She has a place to stay, she has money coming in and she has a car. Sounds like she is actually bringing in more money per month then I did when I had my BS. So she should be okay if she is smart about her money.

Thanks again everyone for your help through this. XOXO

Comments

bluehighlighter's picture

Yayyyy great update!!! Great that she is self sufficient now or getting there. Glad he's not buying all her furniture as well.

"I am still upset about the whole blanket thing and "I am moving to PA" comment. I just feel like he added more drama to the situation then need be. I said if you keep making me look like the bad guy people are going to really think that. And your friends are going to feel uncomfortable around me and vice versa." ---- to hell with them, it sucks but really even when my own friends tell me stuff I'm sure they don't tell me the whole story. with SO and I there are some of his friends who absolutely have no problem with me and see me as a great addition to his life, and know that it's tough. Others can kiss your @$$ they aren't living your life. It sucks but don't even try to talk to them about it or defend yourself. They will see in time and if they don't oh well! They don't matter

"It will def. be brought up in counseling." - GOOD!