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Pigs..just Pigs!!

memyselfandi's picture

Oh my lord..where the heck do I begin???

Stepkids are 12 and 15. I clean the house with hubby's help BEFORE they get here. SUPPOSEDLY his daughter is allergic to dust so we clean and clean.

Then her and her 15 year old brother commence to trash the place leaving all their crap EVERYWHERE!!

If it isn't the house..it's the backseat of the car. Good Lord, as they have to walk all over pop cans..the garbage bag I put there they could throw their garbage in, etc. I guess theY think it's fun when it takes them twice as long to get in and out of the car while they walk all over their garbage.

I refuse to clean it up.

Their room is such a mess you can't get in the closet. His son leaves his dirty jeans all over the floor and his daughter..ugh...she is the biggest slob imaginable!! Clothes in front of the closet...clothes underneath the kitchen floor...etc.

Slobs..that's what they are and it drives me sooo crazy I have to leave the room and go to "My Happy Place"...our bedroom where it is quiet..etc

I can't tell you how many times it was soo bad that, yes...I went again, to my happy place with a sweet, "AHHHHHH!!"

Harleygurl's picture

I wouldn't let them in the car again until they shovel their stuff out of the car. And then I wouldn't let them so much as chew a stick of gum in my car. My car. My rules. What pigs!

ncgal1980's picture

I agree. NO children are allowed to bring food or drinks, or even gum, into my car. The skids are bad to just throw stuff down when they're done with it. They'll be walking down the street with a soda, and when it's empty, they just throw it down on the ground! DH and I don't allow it, and will make them go back and pick it up, but I've watched them with BM, and she does the same thing! Big-time litterbug!

I refuse to drive a rolling landfill like BM does, full of McDonald's bags, soda cans, and other assorted crap filling up the floor like a tiny mountain. So no, the skids know that if they get in my car, that crap stays in the house!

And when they trash the house - which they always do - DH can clean it up. I've stopped giving a damn about it. I'll step over their piles of trash and dirty laundry and just keep on going like it wasn't even there. I tried for the first month or so to clean it up, but then I decided I'm not wasting my time or energy on their junk. Let DH do it if he wants to. I hate having to live in a trashy house every other week, but it's HIS problem, not mine, and I'm NOT cleaning it up anymore!

Rags's picture

The solution is garbage bags and the curb. When they leave their crap all over the place bag it up and put it on the curb. When they ask about their stuff tell them that the last time you saw their crap it was in a barbage bag on the curb. Put not only their belongings in the bag, put their garbage in the bag with their close, etc... Anything they leave laying around instead of putting it where it belongs.

12 & 15 is plenty old enough to grasp the concept of cleaning up after yourself. If you do nto apply consequences, their behavior will not change.

Tell DH and the kids once and only once. Then start pitching their shit out with the garbage.

Good luck.

BitchitBrigit's picture

I married into a family of slobs, too. DH has custody of his 3 kids, BM is mentally ill but still around (funny how she got her act together, started consistently taking her meds, etc. once she had to actually be responsible for herself!). I swear they are all lazy and ADD (including DH!).

Before my first weekend visit to his town (1000 miles away from mine) he hired a team of 3 maids to clean for 3 days, and they barely managed to make a dent in just his bedroom, master bath, and the kitchen. The smell was awful. Litter boxes rarely ever scooped. Literally - literally! - got a rake from the garage to help gather up all the CRAP from the kids' playroom floor (food, wrappers, dead bugs, paper, crayons, you name it). These kids were 13, 11 and 7 at the time.

I told him when he proposed that I would NOT live like that. In our current house, the kids have to keep their crap in their rooms or at least upstairs (where they get to trip over it). BUT they are not allowed to bring food or drink (other than water) upstairs. I figure, if they want to live like pigs in their own space, fine. They complain about how dirty BM's house is (they spend a few nights there each week) but don't see the parallels with their own mess. They were happy, though, after we got the new house together that they could now have friends over (because they weren't embarrassed by their living conditions).

The floor of SD15's room is piled about shin-high with dirty clothes, papers, empty water bottles, you name it. She has not done her laundry in at least 3 months - no exaggeration. I'm just grossed out.

SD13 and SS9 change their underwear about 2x a week. I've gone 3 weeks between laundry loads, and the boy's laundry basket had 4 pairs of undershorts in it. All of which were smeared with poo. Does he only change his drawers after he craps in them????

Of course, I SAY "if they want to live like pigs, fine" but since I've so far paid about 95% of the cost of this house, it's not really "fine" with me if they trash the place.

In the meantime, I smile/grit my teeth and just try to show that there is another way to live.