Step Talk

The only suggestion I would have, is that if you are feeling a wee bit jealous or insecure, hold your head high!

At the times when my son's "other" mom went out of her way to be friendly and happy is when I gave her the most credit. Not saying she was looking for MY approval. I know for a fact now, (from her words and our conversations over the years) how truly insecure and jealous she was of her husbands' and my past relationship. It was always nice that she never showed the smallest bit of resentment or insecurity when we were "thrown" together in certain situations.

And your husband has truly found a wonderful person, meaning you. To put yourself "out there", you are a remarkable woman..... Not many steps feel or try to feel so mature about things like this. It must be very comforting to him to know that he has your 100% support.

Speaking 3-4 times a week, when they are as old as they are seems a bit extreme. The older our son got, the less we spoke. But hey, how are these children? Well adjusted, productive citizens? If so, it is probably because the lines of communication have been left open, without outside people trying to stop them from raising their children.

Kudos to you!!

Hugs,
Janice

But my parents divorced 20 years ago...it wasn't pretty (he cheated on her with his secretary). Since then, my parents have moved on with their lives (Dad is still w/ Secretary, Mom is remarried to a wonderful guy). When we have family get-togethers (Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, Etc.) we ALL get together: meaning, Mom, Step-Dad, Dad, Secretary (they never married but have been together all this time), my siblings, and our collective children, grandchildren. Mom is even friendly with Secretary (she says she feels sorry for her, having to put up with my Dad...tee, he he). My parents have let the past stay in the past and everyone is friendly with each other. My Step-Dad and Dad are even golf buddies! (Step-Dad jokingly refers to my Dad as his 'husband-in-law'). It took them 20 years to get to this place, and I love them all for it. There are no romantic earnings between them anymore, just mutual respect and love for the person to whom they share children together.

That is AMAZING!!! And so nice to hear. If only more bios/steps could be that way, perhaps the children would be a lot more secure and everyone could stop blaming everyone else for the outcome of these kids.

How long have they been doing "together" holidays? From the time you were little? Or is it more recent?

Hugs,
Janice

My situation similar, except kids younger (8 and 10). We have been divorced 4 years and remarried last year. I am still single (no boyfriend either).

Anyway, my ex and I get along. I like his wife. I was with my ex since I was 18, so I'm VERY close to his family. WE went to college together, so we have similar friends.

Bottom line, I think it is insecure and immature for new wife to think that her husband and ex must feel obliged to dislike each other.

Today is Christmas Eve. Every year my ex's family invites me and this year I decided to go, and I think his wife is mad.....and I think she is extremely immature and short-sited for feeling this way...

SHOULDN'T GOOD RELATIONS BE THING WE STRIVE FOR?

My oldest SD has a Christmas get together every year on Christmas eve at her house. Her Mother was there. I never want my SD to feel uncomfortable with me and her Mom there. We actually get along pretty good. I saw she had the prettiest outfit and earrings on last night and told her she looked fantastic. I loved her earrings and told her so. She is remarried and DH is married to me. There is no insecurity here. DH is the one feeling uncomfortable but he is civil to her.

Well this BM's oldest son whom I never met was there last night. He purchased an Xbox 360 for each of his neices and nephews homes. One for SD's home, One for his other sisters kids, and one for our home. I was floored because he also purchased 2 games a piece for each of the homes!!! The kids were thrilled. I told BM even before the gift giving that I was impressed with her son. He was handsome and sweet and had a good nature. She actually hugged me after that comment. She is very proud of her son and well should be.

Now you see my DH didn't want to go because BM was there. Sometimes in life there are unexpected blessings if you just let them happen. Now with my SKIDS BM(the one that lives in another country) that would never happen. She is just too hateful.

"Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt"