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his kids are coming out of the woodwork!

sephorria's picture

I'm not sure if this is the right area to post this. I need to vent and am open to suggestions if you have dealt with something similar. My DH has two younger kids who live sorta near us. DH seems to be off to work constantly now and the SM has suddenly decided she wants the kids to spend more time with us. That would be great except they seem to be spending time with me only since DH is at work. I get along great with the kids so there is no problem. However, DH and I are going out of state for vacation to visit his family. DH also has a 19yr old SD from another relationship who he doesn't know. The SD apparently has suddenly been e-mailing him but he really never mentions her to me. Suddenly DH tells me the 19yr old is meeting us at his family's place for our ENTIRE week's vacation. I spoke to my MIL and she didn't know anything about it. Now both my MIL and myself are a little nervous. My MIL is concerned about getting ready for an additional guest and I am concerned because my only vacation is now going to be spent with DH's estranged daughter. I am resentful that I never get any alone time with my husband. Even weekends he spends working so if I do get out of town, it's spent going with friends hiking and not with DH. Although we dated for 7 years, we have only been married a few months (and didn't go on a honeymoon). For the past 7 years, DH doesn't talk of this 19 yr old. The SD lives across the country and was "adopted" by her mother's new husband.
How do you get past the resentment? How should I handle the vacation situation with the SD whom I know nothing about? I fear my DH will take off visiting his brothers and leave me with the SD. Let me also mention my DH has decided that he "doesn't want kids." I guess that just means with me since he seems to have them with everyone else.