Step Talk

Are you on the child's list of contacts? If not, she may have a point. Make sure that you are on the contact list so that this isn't an worry.

What is the custody arrangement? I think in all states it is the same... there is not just one type of custody, meaning residential, but two types of custody, meaning residential and legal. So even if you don't have any residential custody and the child lives with the other parent full-time, you can still have shared legal custody, which gives both parents the right to make decisions affecting the child. Check your court documents and see what it says about legal custody.

If he has shared legal custody, then he has the right to equal access to school records, same as BM. If he does, then he needs to call the principal and make an appointment to meet with the principal and the teacher. Take the court documents with you showing that he also has legal custody and then the school cannot legally withhold information from him. They will have to work with him the same way that they would the mother. Period. If they are not prepared to do this, then I'd take it to the superindendent of the school board.

This all needs to come from your husband, though, and not you. I don't know what the ramifications would be if she did try to have you arrested, I doubt if she could find anyone to arrest you, because you've committed no crime. It is not a crime to make a phone call to a school teacher. (What an idiot!) You personally might not be legally entitled to the information, but the guilty party would be the school releasing it, not you for requesting it, especially if you request it at the behest of your spouse. So don't let her intimidate you, but do make sure all the communications come from your husband because that just makes it easier for everyone involved. If it comes from him or appears to come from him, then she has no gripe.

~ Anne ~

That, sadly, is the decision of the school, not me. When WE were having issues, she contacted the school and THEY told her that they would and could not answer any of her concerns. However, if my son's dad called, that would be fine.

I even called the school and assured them that it IS okay to direct any answers to her if my she/ex were concerned about OUR son.

I have always believed in a united front. I have tried very hard to remain that way.

Unfortunately, the law may not agree.......

Janice

PS: More on united front on my post of a.d.d.

Why is it that grandparents have more rights to a child then stepparents? I read something (on here I believe) where the grandparents can take the custodial parent to court to receive visitation of their grandchildren…I recall that in what I was reading, the custodial mother did not want the paternal grandfather to see her children b/c her ex-husband had confided in her that his father had sexually abused either him or his siblings when they were younger…but the judge awarded this grandfather unsupervised visitation rights…but a step parent can’t call a school about a child that they often SHARE the responsibility of caring for, often times much more then a grandparent does!

Make a GREAT Day!

I think grandparents have more rights then stepparents because you know the old saying "blood is thicker than water". I think the fact that they are blood relatives and the parents of the child's parent makes a huge difference to the courts than someone who marries mom or dad and is not blood related. I could be wrong but that's what it seems like to me. Stepparent's don't have too many rights (if any at all ) when it comes to our stepchildren because the truth is as much as we may care for them, love them and take part in raising them the fact still remains that we are not their parents and the law makes that Crystal Clear to stepparents. If we adopt our stepchildren then it's a different story but if neither parent has signed over any rights to us then we are very limited in our involvement in our skids lives. It's a sad truth, but I think if more stepparents would tell themselves this it would save alot of frustration and even heartache.