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Yosemite's Blog

BM blowout at football practice....you would think she'd be more mature at 50!!! Tell me if you think I need an RO or not.

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Background: BM goes through periods of wanting my DH back and acts like a nut whenever this occurs. I have had very limited contact with her for years because of this. However, recently she had been trying to play nice with several big conciliatory gestures so I was trying as well. Then came Father's day, which happened to fall on her weekend. DH wanted to pick up SS11 in the morning and BM didn't want to give him up till the afternoon. DH made the mistake of saying it was because he wanted SS to be included in the Father's day events I was planning.

Dear DH, My children don't answer to YOU, they answer only to ME. They only have to be polite to you. Why don't you get that?!

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DH had the fucking nerve to dump an ice chest of freezing cold water leftover from our party last night on nephew-15 (I have full custody of nephew) because he didn't get out of bed when he was asked to. WTF made him think that was okay?!
DH doesn't get it, he really doesn't. I have asked him to come to ST to read about disengaging but he won't do it.
I don't want, don't need and don't care about his opinion in regards to MY children. DH can fuck off if he doesn't like how I parent. In turn, he can parent his however he likes.

OT update- I got a Chrismas card from Tacoman and his daughter!

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I had really amazing experience early this year (http://www.steptalk.org/node/180319) when God chose me to be his food and comfort delivery person for a complete stranger. Yesterday, I got a Christmas card from that stranger (I'll call him Tacoman) and his daughter. Tacoman is doing much better. While he is sad about his son not being here for Christmas, Tacoman has regained his faith that his son is in a better place. His daughter thanked me again and thinks that the taco incident is what helped her dad regain his faith.

Temper tantrum or nah?

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BM gave DH a pocket organizer for his birthday. She wrote cute little notes on every page and marked down dates like their anniversary. I AM LIVID. DH says she's just trying to improve their communication about school functions and the anniversary thing was a joke (she's never given him gifts while we have been together). She did put my kids' birthdays and our anniversary in the calendar as well as exchange dates and school functions. I give DH a work organizer every Christmas with everything in it, so he doesn't need another one, but BM probably doesn't know that.

Boys found Grandpa's Playboy magazines.....To tell BM or not to tell BM

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My FIL passed away last summer. When cleaning out his garage, we found some old Playboy magazines. Amused, my DH shoved them in a "keep" box along with other items. DH had a hard time letting go and wound up with many "keep" boxes which were put into our garage cabinets to be gone through again later. DH hasn't gotten around to going through them, I think it's still too painful for him.

Drunk dialing followed by fake smiling, never a dull moment with BM!

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BM drunk dialed me on Saturday night. Slurring her words and all. It was pretty funny. BM went on and on about how she really thinks I'm a good person but she can't stand to see me with DH, it hurts her too much so she gets angry and does things she's not proud of. She basically gave this long winded, rambling, apology for all her B.S. and thanked me for all I've done for her and the stepkids.

It all becomes clear..BM's sister called me. She cosigned for BMs house & wants off that mortgage. So now BM wants off DH's ASAP

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In my previous blog I explained DH and BM are still on the mortgage together for the house we live in. DH can't qualify to assume the mortgage alone. BM has been fine with this for years, but now is wanting me to take out a mortgage for this house. I refuse to do so because I don't want this house.
BM's sister called me today to ask if I would reconsider because apparently she cosigned for BMs current house and she wants off that mortgage. Ummm....no.

Another day another drama- Today it's that BM wants proof of my income, supposedly to get her name off DH's mortgage

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We live in DH's house. He bought out BM and she signed a quit claim deed. That was the extent of their agreement. This was eight years ago. However, BM is still on the mortgage. I honestly don't think either of them even thought about that until BM went to buy a new house 4 years ago. Then she asked DH to assume the mortgage on this house. DH has tried to assume the loan twice but since he is self employed and his income is so unpredictable, the bank won't approve it.
BM was able to get her house, but she wants DH to keep trying to assume the loan on this one.

BM freaked out in public at Meet the teacher night, over MY name change. Poor SS!

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Apparently BM didn't know I was changing my last name to DH's last name. At Meet the Teacher last night for SS stb 11, DH introduced himself to teacher as SS's father Firstname Lastname, then said this is SS's stepmom Yosemite DHlastname. BM was standing right there and says "You took his last name? I don't want you having the same last name as SS. Everyone is going to be confused by that. How could you do this without talking to me?! Or at least telling me? What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Her voice was rising as she was speaking so that she was practically yelling by the end of it.

OT- How long did it take you to get used to being called Mrs. DH?

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I really didn't want to change my name but since I was insisting on some other stuff (pre-nup) and DH really wanted me to change my name, I thought I had better throw him a bone. So I did it. We got married in May, due to typical slowness at courthouse, social security and MVD, my name has only been Mrs. DH for about a month. So far, any time anyone says Mrs. DH, it doesn't even catch my attention! I completely ignore them until they throw my first name out there. Mind you, it's a pretty common last name, but I feel bad that it doesn't even feel like my name yet.

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