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Frustr8d1's Blog

Do Skids Have Selective Memory on Purpose?!

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SD9 seems to never remember any of the good, fun, awesome things we do for her (after 3 yrs of being with us full-fucking-time), yet, when she spends a couple of weeks with loser felony-$4,600 behind in CS BM, over the summer, SD decides that BM is so much fucking fun because she took her for ice cream and McDonald's kids meals all summer. Mind you, this is the BM who didn't send a damn thing for birthdays OR Christmas, and we had to FORCE BM to spend this summer with SD.

Not Venting, Just Slightly Annoyed...Again.

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SD9 lost a school book a week ago and yesterday the school finally sent a "bill" to us for replacement. Yeah, I know she's only nine and I know kids do this all the time. But, where I'm annoyed is lazy BM never has to deal with any of this shit. BM is $4,600 behind in her tiny monthly CO support. SD just spent her first visit in 3 yrs with her this summer, during which time BM promised to buy SD's school clothes. SD came back with only a couple of inappropriate t-shirts and a pair of pants. BM has never paid a dime toward medical/dental bills that are CO'd to be split 50/50.

Finally Lost It

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It's been over 3 weeks since SD9 came back from her FIRST visit with BM in 3 yrs. Over the summer, this kid changed completely...as in, I'm afraid of her. She hasn't spoken a word to me other than a forced "hi" a couple of times. Yesterday, she left a big note on our couch that says "Mother Foucker Mother." She has been sneaking, hiding, talking back to DH...on and on.

Should I be Scared?

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Before I went to bed last night, I had the living room completely clean. No toys or anything on the floor. This morning, DH got SD9 up and ready before he left for work. SD left for school about 5 min after DH left for work so she was in the living room/kitchen by herself for a few. I was feeling sick so I didn't even get out of bed until an hour after SD left for school.

When I walked in the living room, right there on the floor in front of the couch, was my 2 yr old's magnetic drawing board. On the board, in very crappy handwriting, it says,

Do BMs Poison SDs?

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We have SD9 full time. BM hasn't contacted or seen SD for 3 yrs until this past summer.

How do you know if BM has told SD bad things about you? Based on SD9's behavior and treatment toward us after a relatively short summer visit with BM (first visit in 3 yrs), I'm almost positive that BM poisoned her against ALL of us. Suddenly, SD is mean to her half-sister (who she absolutely loved BEFORE summer), disrespectfull to DH (who she acted normal toward BEFORE summer), and a complete ignorant ASS to me (when she was all up in my face trying to seek my approval BEFORE summer).

Which is the Lesser of the 2 Evils??

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Which is easier:

A) Have a stepchild full-time, with no help (time-wise or financially) from BM, but deal with all the emotional issues of SD, have the burden of raising & teaching the hard lessons in life, coping with different moods & behaviors, compromising time & schedules, etc.

Dirol Have stepchild living with BM full-time and deal with child support & visitation issues.

Gloating WITHDRAWN

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This is no success story yet... Sadly, what I described above was only a snapshot, a brief moment in time. SD9 woke up this morning hostile and passive-aggressive as ever. She puposely left her half eaten bowl of cereal on the couch, making the point that she is wasteful and uses way more milk than necessary in an effort to stick it to me. She knows how much I hate wasted food/milk. Then, when she walked out the door for school, she slammed the door so hard the windows shook. It scared the crap out of my 2 year old.

Return from Summer Update

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So, after 3 years of living full time with us and BM refusing to contact SD9 during those 3 years, SD returned from her first visit in 3 yrs with BM over the summer. Needless to say, she returned to us completely brainwashed or something!? I've been in shock for the past 4 days, wondering WTF happened to this kid we used to know?! For 3 years, we went through SO much pain & agony to transform a lying, stealing, manipulating 9yo into a somewhat "normal" child. She left at the start of summer, crying that she didn't want to leave us.

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