Well, I thought for the first time since my mom passed three years ago I'd actually enjoy Christmas, since I have my first bundle of joy! I was actually looking forward to it and was excited and before I go any further I do realize that Christmas has NOTHING to do with presents, trust me, material things don't mean much to me.

my part of the issues here. I know I'm not a perfect step mom, I realize that, I've completely admitted to it and own up to it and I don't pretend to be perfect. I continuously let DH and the SKs know that I'm working on it and will always work on it. BUT why am I the only one owning up to having issues? Why am I the only one NOT pretending to be perfect?? Why am I the only one who is trying to grow as a person? When does everyone else own up to their issues? When does everyone else start to work on themselves? When does everyone else AT LEAST admit that they aren't perfect? When do we get to quit pretending we're a "perfect little family" and start being real and honest about how things really are???

So my baby is two weeks old today. He's my first biological kid and for the first time since I've been a SM have I really realized how horrible the step kids biological mom's are. I CANNOT grasp the concept that they just leave their kids. One of the BM's only gets her son (my SS14) like once a month and usually can't pick him up until REALLY late and he was just there for four days and he didn' thave a shower the ENTIRE time he was there and he came back smelling like DIRTY cigarettes and she doesn't wash his clothes, which he puts in the laundry and makes our laundry room and all the other clothes in there smell like cigarettes... And she usually drops him off at her sisters house, so she doesn't even really see him.

I just wanted to let everyone know that I am officially a BM now!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isaac James got here on Monday at 2:45pm, he's beautiful and I'm so in love!
TTFN
Dawn

I'll be a BM !!!!! I'm being induced Thursday night and baby Isaac should get here sometime Friday morning! Which, would be my mom's 51st birthday, so it kinda worked out perfectly! Unless my blood preasure keeps rising then I'll have to go to the hospital even earlier, but I'm hoping it stays down.

I seriously think that on top of having a step parent site I need a place for my MIL blog.....grrr!! My DH is an only child, his parents got divorced when he was 4 and his mom remarried a man with three kids. (Making her a step mom). DH grew up with his step brother, but his step sisters treated him like crap. Probably b/c my MIL treated him like a baby, (and still does). DH insists that he doesn't have "only child syndrome" b/c he was raised with his step brother, but as far as I'm concerned he definitely has it and there's just something different about having a sibling from your real mom, there's just a bond you can't explain.

Well, it's almost 2 am and I can't sleep. My body is exhausted but I just can't seem to actually crash. I'm 37 weeks pregnant and I'm ready for the baby to get here already!! I could bitch about the step kids, they have all irritated me at some point this evening, but I'm too exhausted to try.

So, I don't really have anything important to say, I just need to vent b/c I'm annoyed. I'm almost 9 months pregnant and been running ALL the errands with all three Skids, DH convienently forgets appointments and activities so I get stuck doing it, whatever! Anyway, they all have dentist appointments today. And they are at three different school in three different areas of our town, annoying right? Well, yesterday I go over what time I'll be picking all of them up. SS14 in highschool, I say to him, "I'm coming at 2:10 and I'm calling the school so they'll release you b/c I'm too pregnant and exhausted to get in and out of the car, so please be ready."

So, DH finds out that SD13 has posted EXTREMELY inappropriate things on her MySpace page. Mind you, this is the MySpace account that I begged she not get b/c I was afraid of this exact thing (I told him NONE of the kids needs them and he let SS14 have it, so then I felt bad that SD13 didn't get one). AND I told him NOT to let them have the internet in their rooms b/c of this EXACT reason and of course he didn't listen and they have it in their rooms. SO anyway, she's posting horrible things, being WAY over sexual, taking a little too sexy pictures (at least as far as I'm concerned), asking to see pictures of guys w/o their shirts on, telling them "i'm not a whore, or am i? LOL" (I'm so not laughing), asking them about when they last had a Bj, telling them she's like a guy that likes to have fun but doesnt' go all the way, telling them where she lives, talking to guys with names like "fk the mfkn world"

NOTHING irritates me more than this last minute scheduling B.S. The younger two SKids don't have to worry about last minute scheduling b/c of their mom only being on supervised visits but the SS14 drives me CRAZY with the last minute crap. DH and this BM dont' have a custody order or anything, they've been very good with each other about custody and letting SS decide where he wants to be (however DH paid her CS but she doesn't pay us CS)...BUT...we're a FIVE person family, getting ready to be a SIX person family and I can't deal with the last minute scheduling! I've tried to explain this to DH and I've told the SS14 over and over and over and over that he needs to arrange his visits with his mom before Wednesday (and I think that's being nice, I'd like a weeks notice) and as always he waits until THURSDAY night to make arrangements. His mom is ALWAYS late or always calling and not picking him up until Saturday morning when we have a million things going on. And then not showing up until bedtime on Sunday and usually without dinner. She lets him stay up as late as he wants and sleep until like 2 on Sundays which doesn't help with the school routine I work so hard to get all the kids in. I've talked to DH about this and he just ignores it, he doesn't deal with the schedules he lets me so what does he care, but it's driving me nuts.
Are my pregnancy hormones OUT OF CONTROL or should I keep pushing to get a better routine??
Dawn

Do you ever feel like your DH has checked out and the sole responsilbity of the SK's land on your shoulders? And when you ask him about it he questions whether or not I'll be able to handle the baby I'm getting ready to have. Do they ever realize that the bond is not the same??

I just realized I should probably let some of you know that there's still no baby yet I have had the conversation with DH about his kids not needing to be there until well after Isaac (the new baby) is born. I actually talked to my SD13 about it too, asking if she wanted to be there (b/c she was the only one I was comfortable with just being in the waiting room) and she said she'd just rather wait at home and then show up with the baby there. She was smart enough to say "I've seen you pregnant for 9 months, that's not exciting, I just wanna see the baby." So...phew..everyone took it somewhat well. I told DH HE needs to tell HIS mother to NOT bring the kids until after Isaac is born.

So... We have our monthly two hour supervised visit with the BM this Friday. A day NO ONE in our house looks forward to, especially SD13. After the last visit I discussed with DH that I would prefer to not attend the visitations anymore because I'm not 8 months pregnant and I have no intention of taking my son to see this woman. Because I don't feel like we should subject any more children to this woman, she is, to be nice, an idiot!

So, we had our monthly two hour supervised vistit (at the court house) with the younger two's BM right before school started. Well, she had insisted the visit before that she wnated to buy the kids shoes for school. Mind you, she claimed the last time we were in court 3 years ago can only work 5 hours a week b/c of the stress we've put her through and only pays $110/month for TWO KIDS!! (The other BM pays nothing.) Anyway, that's here nor there. So, two visits ago she keeps asking the kids what size shoes they were, they are kids they don't have a clue, so after about 10 minutes of her asking them, I FINALLY told her. I guess she thought I was trying to make her look stupid by telling her the wrong size because...

Well, I haven't been here much. For some reason I felt guilty about it, like I was betraying my DH and SKs because I was complaining, then I realized I need to get it off my chest. How did I realize this? I completely lost it a couple days ago and I have the same feeling I did right before I lost it, so I'm hoping the venting will help keep me away from blowing up. Because I really don't want to