Well, I spoke with my SS this weekend and he said that he was thinking of getting married, but he didn't know how to tell his dad that we wouldn't be invited to the wedding because it would hurt his mom and the SD too much.

I just want to scream. Last night the SD calls her dad and says to meet her outside the house because she wants to talk to him without the bitch (which would be me, I guess). So she drives up and sits on my front porch yelling and cussing at her father.

Well, I guess the "evil" step-mom had struck again it seems. Or at least that is what my SD has told her father. She called him yesterday to inform him that she was no longer a part of our lives. It's all my fault and in her words I got what I always wanted.

Well, I thought I would post on the selfishness of my step-daughter. Hubby called her and the step-son last week to inform them of Christmas plans for this year. He called them both back on Friday to tell them what time we would be eating, etc.

Happy Thanksgiving! I felt pretty good yesterday so we went out to my uncle's house for dinner. Had an enjoyable time and came home to nap for a bit. We never heard a word from SS or SD, but really never expected to either.

I am having a bit of a "pity party" for myself today I guess. I just had a bit of a mental break down! After all of my strong talk about being ready to get the show on the road, now that I know when I start chemo, I am scared to death.

Ok this is what I received back from our insurance company on the step-daughter and medical insurance. My brain has processed so much already with my cancer and treatments that this is not making any sense to me. Can somebody help me translate this? Is it saying that because we were ordered in the divorce to carry insurance that we have to continue until she's 24 or am I reading it the wrong way? The step-daughter is 19, unmarried, lives with her biomom and has a full time job, not going to school. Thanks!

I just needed to vent a bit today and I figured what better place to do it than here with people who know a bit about what I'm going through.
My step-daughter who we had not seen or spoken to for over a year (because she got with the wrong crowd, etc.

Well yesterday I went to see Dr. Reaves, the oncologist. Who is also the same doctor that my mother used when she had cancer. My appointment was for 1:30 pm. So we drive to the hospital where his office is located and it looks as if the building had been evacuated. It was a fire drill! First of all, they had about 15 chemo patients standing outside attached to their IV's and it hit me. I will be one of them soon. Several looked really good and actually healthy and others looked like death warmed over. It was such a shock to see this for me. I got a little "teary". My hubby said that it also affected him this way. His thinking was "We don't belong here!" The closest person to my age group was a woman that was approximately 50 years old or so. That's over 13 years older than me! What am I doing here? Anyway, the fire drill ended and we went upstairs to the doctor's office and waited. I didn't get in to see the doctor until 3pm and then the appointment lasted a bit over an hour. I liked Dr. Reaves! He explained things in a way that was understandable instead of all the doctor terms and he made me feel comfortable. He also explained that my cancer is completely different than the type my mom had and told me not to worry about outcome or side effects being anything like what mom went through. He also explained more about "my cancer" and then explained the chemo and hormone therapy that I will be going through. OK, I'll try to explain it a bit for you now....................................................

Well, it's me again! I wanted to post a little note to let everyone know that I am alive and kicking! Surgery went well and they removed both breasts and approximately 9 to 12 lymph nodes. (I'm a little foggy on the lymph nodes!) There was no cancer in the lymph nodes but approximately 6 cm of invasive cancer in the left breast.

Okay, I need some input or advice! My mind is going crazy right now. I'm worried about surgery on Wednesday! Worried about my hubby and son and how they are going to be while I am down after surgery! Now, the ex-wife and her friends are causing trouble on my personal blog.

Sorry I haven't updated, it's just been a whirlwind around here. I met with the surgeon and a total mastectomy of my left breast is mandatory with biopsy of my lymph nodes. My case is so unusual that they really don't know what they are working with, therefore, until after surgery I won't know if is invasive or not. I have decided also to go ahead and have both breasts removed due to a sighting of "cysts" in the right breast. They informed me that the chances of breast cancer returning in the other breast is higher due to my age and already having cancer. I am only 37! Surgery is scheduled for October 11.

Just wanted to say thank you to all of you. The response of thoughts and prayers was a bit overwhelming. I appreciate it so much. Words can not explain how much it means so me to have all of your support.

I wanted to update all on my biopsy I had done last week and ask for more prayers! The results came back that I do in fact have breast cancer! I go in this afternoon for an MRI to make sure that the cancer is indeed confined to just the breast and after that will be an appointment to see the surgeon and find out my options.

This year has positively been the year from HELL for me! I understand that God only puts on you what he thinks you can handle and it all makes you stronger in the end, but I have had enough! I can't take any more!